Fun Leisure Traveling   Travel, Leisure and Trips Tips

Ah the family vacation. We all look forward to that valuable bonding time with our loved ones. It’s been planned for months, the money squirreled away, and the anticipation built to a crescendo. “How many more sleeps daddy?” Good times, a break from the rat race, and the height of summer delights are just around the corner. Or are they?

Embarking on a family vacation with young children, I can now attest, takes some ingenuity and hard-nosed research. Kudos to you Google. No matter what the website says, the ‘quaint, rustic cottage’, in reality, means tiny and littered with mouse droppings. ‘Child-friendly swimming area’, turns out to be a snake-infested swamp. And that dilapidated shed down by the water that sells chips and pop is the ‘full-service marina’. All of these ’surprises’ may be charming for the young couple unfettered with kids but are curses to the family with generally well-behaved tots who are now cutting new teeth or peppering you with repetitive questions until three in the morning. Yes the family vacation truly is a matter of psychological survival. Disposing of any romanticized visions of a Norman Rockwell family portrait is step one. Think more along the lines of Chevy Chase or Steve Martin. Follow these ten crucial rules and you may survive, dare I say even enjoy, your maiden trek with tots in tow.

1) Bring reinforcements. Even if they are your in-laws, having others to tag along should be a top priority for rookie travelers with young children. Ideally, siblings, friends, or even second cousins are the preferred choice. Beg, plead, do whatever it takes. They are an invaluable tool for your survival. Getting away from your family while on vacation, as backwards as it sounds, it vital to your long-term mental health. Finding solitude, even for an hour, to decompress and regroup will increase the odds of actually enjoying the family vacation. In the likely event that reinforcements laugh in your face and decline your invitation, it will be imperative that both adults play each other off once in awhile. Potential pitfall: this alone time must be equitable to both. Failing to adhere to this rule will result in problems that only an entirely new article can address.

2) Have a map handy. The indispensable GPS suddenly becomes just another annoying voice in the chaos that is your car when it fails to recognize the county roads or the recently renamed side roads you find yourself lost on. Bringing an old-fashioned road map, or one downloaded from Google, will save you the aggravation of two hungry kids and your spouse begging you to stop for directions. Added benefit: maps don’t flash ‘Acquiring Satellite’ for an hour.

3) Hit a grocery store on the way in. The ‘full-service’ marina closes at 4:00 pm and doesn’t carry anything of nutritional value anyway. And don’t forget the condiments, especially if your daughter won’t even look at hot dog without any ketchup on it. While you are at it, buy some Calamine lotion because you will be told two days into your stay that the ’swimming area’ is surrounded in poison ivy. Tip: Do not try to prove that you know what poison ivy looks like by picking up a random plant and rubbing it all over your body. The hospital is more than an hour away.

4) Take up jogging. Not only will your heart thank you but so will your state of mind. It’s a great excuse to get out of the psych ward, especially when timed with notorious ‘fussy’ periods. Nobody will begrudge your dedication to a healthy lifestyle. However, scouting out the terrain in advance is a must. Foolishly taking a route past marshy or boggy wetlands will leave you with a few hundred uninvited buzzing guests around you to contend with. Tip: To avoid suspicion, make jogging part of your new healthy routine months prior to the actual date of the family vacation.

5) Bring plenty of drugs. Of course not the illicit kind. The youngest will most definitely decide to cut new teeth during this family pilgrimage while the oldest will find a wall to fall off. Children’s acetaminophen or ibuprofen are wonderful marvels of medicine that should be used whenever possible. Adult versions should also be readily available. FYI: Alcohol may intensify the effect.

6) Provide your own life jackets. Personal Flotation Devices from the ’60s were not manufactured with the same safety standards employed by their modern day cousins. Plus, not only is idea of decades of b.o. touching your skin repulsive, it is virtually impossible to escape (reference Seinfeld episode).

7) Bring your own toilet paper. Nothing accelerates the irritation factor (pardon the pun) like toilet paper that could have come from a hardware store. Recommendation: Make sure this is your suggestion. Your genus factor will rise when your spouse, swishing from numerous Tim Horton stops, desperately needs to make a potty stop on one of the side roads you’ll eventually get lost on.

All-purpose wipes. Invest heavily in them. Wipes are not strictly for baby’s bottoms. Have you ever seen a one-year old eat an ice cream cone?

9) Save your spare change: This will come in handy in two ways. First, no matter how many clothes you pack, a trip to the local Laundromat is inevitable. But to spin it in your favour, volunteer to make the trip yourself. This becomes an additional ‘mental health’ break that is not covered by the stipulations found in tip #1.

10) Bring your 3G phone: With sketchy internet service at best, your laptop will become a glorified DVD player, susceptible to varying degrees of dirty fingers. However, 3G phones have an amazing ability to fill all of your wired needs from emailing to just plain surfing. Warning: Set to quiet. Use sparingly in the presence of family. Remember you are on ‘vacation’. If desperate, phone may be used out of view when nature calls. Use antibacterial soap generously.

Do not, at any time, deviate from these ten rules for surviving the family vacation. Doing so absolves the writer (me) of any liability whatsoever. Because in theory, although the rustic cottage away from it all may sound ideal and life-changing, the journey is fraught with hazards from the moment you leave your driveway. Fun can be had on this mission of misery, but only at the price of diligence and obedience. Be sure to bring a camera for posterity’s sake.

If you are looking for an affordable vacation in Jamaica, beachfront at Negril then check out the Crystal Waters Villas

An affordable vacation beachfront at Negril Jamaica at the Crystal Waters Villas could be just what you and your family are looking for this year.

There are one bedroom Superior Villas, and Deluxe Villas, two bedroom two bathroom Standard, Superior and Deluxe Villas, and a three bedroom three bathroom Superior Villa, varying in price during the winter season from $160 up to $ 450, so they are definitely affordable, and even more so during the summer months when the prices go from $125 to $330.

Crystal Waters Villas has a superb location, being beachfront, right in the middle of the beach at Negril. Each villa has an air conditioned bedroom, and they are all spacious and well furnished. You will also have a trained housekeeper who cooks, and she will take care of the daily chores, as well as serving up tasty Caribbean dishes. Not only is this an affordable vacation it also has real quality to it, with a satisfaction rating of over 90%.

Because of the position, Crystal Waters Villas is within easy walking distance of everything you will need for your affordable family vacation. So you are close to water sports facilities, shops, restaurants and hotels. You will find taxis readily available and not expensive. If you need fresh fruit and vegetables, or you would like fish or even lobster then it can be delivered.

The very helpful staff will also organise sightseeing tours, golf, tennis, in fact anything you want. If you make contact before arriving, you will be met off the plane. You won’t even need to check in, the driver will take you right to your villa, and almost certainly you will be greeted by the smell of something delicious cooking. The skill of the staff even extends to knowing almost exactly when you will arrive, and the fact that you will be hungry. The cook will make breakfast and dinner, and organise most fresh food from the vendors who deliver.

What you are getting with Crystal Waters Villas is not only an affordable family vacation in a great villa hotel, but really great value on a wonderful seven mile long powdery white sand beach. There are thatch huts, deck chairs and hammocks on the private bit of the beach that Crystal Waters Villas owns, and you won’t be bothered too much by salesmen on the beach because of the efficient security.

In closing here are a few hints and tips which will help you to enjoy your time beachfront at Negril.

You will be pleased to here if this is an affordable family vacation, that there is a decent size pool, a children’s Pool.

You won’t need to get up early for the hammocks and loungers on the beach.

Check with the cook who comes with supplies and on what days and at what time, so you can go and choose what you want or ask her to do it for you.

If she does this and does grocery shopping you are going to need a plentiful supply of cash, and that should be in small bills.

You will have a great time, and an affordable vacation at Crystal Waters Villas, to get rid of the stresses and strains of 21st century life.

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